Sunday, February 22, 2009

I Miss Paris Badly

My last post to fulfill my promise to my friend so that I'll not be eaten as his lunch (hmpf) ... will be a rant from my heart, which many of you would have already known anyway. Yes ... it's
I MISS PARIS BADLY!!!!!!!!

:'(
My body is here but my heart is really there. Yes, you may say I'm just a tourist there and of course I'll miss it since I was there to play and not to work and live. I can't completely disagree with that thought either but there was something about France I really like!

Some of my friends in Asia said if I do live there, I'll not get used to their super quiet "Sunday" where most of the major shops are closed. Well, people there apparently don't SHOP as much as people in Asia, but I just love it! What I really miss the most is the quality of the conversation I'm able to get while I'm with the locals there. And I love how much care and thoughts they give into what they buy, what they eat, their culture, their history, etc. It's amazing.

At times like this I can't help but wonder why is Europe so far away? Why I can't stand the aircon in Singapore and I was pretty much happy during the cold winter in Europe (with the right gear of course!!!). But if there's one thing I really really love about Asia ... Singapore and Indonesia in particular ... that will be the convenience of the public toilets system! I'll not take that for granted! With a small bladder like mine ... toilets are like my bestest friend ever!!! But, then I survived too when I was there. With the bulky winter clothes and my heavy backpack, I still survive the toilets adventure!

I really hope Hiro from Heroes will just zap me there whenever I want ... ah well, for now I can only stare at the photos I've brought back and give thanks to the experience that I already have. I'll just tell myself, Paris, I'll be back.

The Heart of Life

As I'm still scratching my head to write something that's more substantial while being accompanied by John Mayer's The Heart of Life, I thought to myself, why don't I share this song to my readers.

Well, let me first share with you the full lyrics of the song:

THE HEART OF LIFE
BY JOHN MAYER

I hate to see you cry
Lying there in that position
There's things you need to hear
So turn off your tears and listen

Pain throws you heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
No, it won't all go the way, it should
But I know the heart of life is good

You know it's nothing new
Bad news never had good timing
Then the circle of your friends
Will defend the silver lining

Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
No, it won't all go the way, it should
But I know the heart of life is good

Pain throws your heart to the ground
Love turns the whole thing around
Fear is a friend who's misunderstood
But I know the heart of life is good

I know it's good

There are 2 lines that hit me:
1. You know it's nothing new, bad news never had good timing
2. Fear is a friend who's misunderstood, but I know the heart of life is good

The year 2009, has been an awful year so far. Seriously, awful. I'm quite tired of being an energizer bunny whom people think my life has been pretty smooth sailing and I'm able to spread joy and motivate people but seriously, this is life, get real and it's been terrible recently.

And yes, like John Mayer said,"...it's nothing new, bad news never had good timing." I've seen it happened to so many souls this year and yours truly included. It's tough. And the road ahead, is super murky. I can't see a thing. It's that bad.

When you are so low, sometimes you really forget that your head can be used to look up too. Yes, it's seriously hard to look up at time like this. Seriously. When I try to look up, the voices push me down further to the pit of "worse-than-ever". How can one survive in sucha state of mind?

I don't know ...

But, I guess the song is a great reminder for me and for those who are in the down-low that, don't you forget .... "The heart of life is good."

Eventually, this too shall pass ... and life will be good again. Everything has its cycle and it happened to be a very turbulent time, this year. It will crawl back up, eventually. And meanwhile, I'll immerse myself in John Mayer's voice .... enjoy the video through this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TS8NvoMudy8 or from the embedded video below. :)


Yes, This is Really Me

I know it's been really long since I last wrote. If you've read the latest post on my Quote's Blog, you'll find out, I've made a promised to a friend that I've to blog or if not, I'll be his lunch -.-" Geez. So here I am ... going to "flood" your mailbox with minimum 3 posts for today. And, this will be counted as one post. A really really really short "intro" that I'm still alive and yes, I'll write more.

Now, I really need to scratch my head really hard to think of what to write. Aih .... See ya soon.

Monday, February 2, 2009

One Thing I Know I Have Plenty Of ....

I just came back from another short trip. This time, it's my hometown - Pematang Siantar. We call it P.Siantar, Siantar or simply Xtar now. Wow, I am surprised I can find a wikipedia page about it. :D And yes, that's my town and Jalan Merdeka is where I stay.

It's the time of the year where most Chinese will gather and go back to spend time with their family. It's Chinese New Year! This time I chose to go back to my hometown and spent time with my parents. :) Along the way, I got to spend more time with my naggy granny and generous aunt and uncle whom I've always been very close to since I was young. It's a great mini family reunion indeed.

Besides my family, one thing I know for sure I have plenty of from this trip is that I have lots of great friends. Well, there are a few belong to the "irritating" category where they keep shoveling you with their ideas and plans when you don't want to participate in it. But overall, they have been really great! Nice catching up and lots of discoveries.

Some have gone all the way out to help me and some have made sure I had a great time in my town. I'm truly touched. Some simply appear at the right time and at the right place after 13 years, that was really a nice surprised.

But I've also learned that not all friends are great. There are some you simply need to cut loose for whatever reasons that do not tick with you. I used to be a keeper, I try hard to keep as many friends as possible thinking that "oh ... every soul is precious." But seriously, I've come to learn that's simply bullsh**. There's no such things as everyone deserves your time and attention. Some are really meant to be cut loose, sooner or later, you will discover them. To my surprise, after some purging, I have made rooms for more newer and greater friends.

Now ... I appreciate the friendships that I already have, I have an open mind and a pair of opened-eyes to make sure new friends keep on flowing, and I also train myself to purge and discard those who have not been creating any values in my life. Values to me are not just something I get from that person, but when I can't see how I am able to give and contribute to one's life anymore, adios, my friend. I'm sorry. Our paths have made their decisions to take on separate ways.

Another thing I know everyone has plenty of is that great friendships are available for everyone as long as one's willing to work on the balance in the game of giving and receiving; be it time, attention or simply acknowledgment. You'll be as surprised as I was, am and forever will be.