Redefine Oneself

Huh!

As if I know anything about the subject.

Exactly, thanks to me not knowing, I'm compelled to write about it. For years I've been trying to define me, define my blog as the expert says, you need to find a niche. You need to specialize in something.

Alas, after so many years of figuring things out, I still can't find my niche. I still specialize in nothing. This frustrates me to the core.

When I look at people around me, I'm able to pinpoint:
- she is a supply chain specialist
- he dwells in hardware
- she is so good in her French
- it is so good in loving people (yes, I'm referring to the wonderful four-legged creature that I adore)

Then I take a look back at myself, what am I good at? I am not expert in skin care just because I'm working in the industry. I'm not a specialist in short term rental just because I dwelled in it for a while and worse, my beloved language of French, I'm so far from mastering it. My passion was procrastinated as I lost my steam then I stopped the course as I couldn't commit. Well, simple case look at my blogging habit, kinda say it all about me and specializing in something. This just sadden me to the core. How am I going to define myself? What am I good at?

That's when I realize defining myself in such a rigid manner doesn't work for me at all. I am who I am and I am who I'm evolving into (thanking someone for this insight). I am accepting to be the specialist in nothing and everything. I may not know a particular subject in depth but I am sure I at least heard of it or willing to learn about it. I am not ignorant.

I may not be the top student in French anymore (thanks to my lazy other half :p) but throw me back to Paris and I should be able to converse to the children now instead of playing alphabet games with them like I did in December 2008 (as shown below).

I am evolving and I love who I am becoming so far. I still not sure what is my niche, who I want to be and it may get fuzzier as I think harder. But as I let things simply flow together with life, so far it had never failed to surprise me.

I define myself as a human being with a curious mind and ever evolving soul that when I come to the end point, one thing I am sure is that I have grown to be better than I was before.